Rant

It drives me nuts....

I just want to make a simple recipe. We went to the pumpkin farm today and bought a bag of nice, yummy apples. My plan was to make an apple crisp to have with icecream tonight (for sweetest day?).  I can just imagine the smell it will create in our house.  And the warmth of eating it with some yummy vanilla icecream.

But looking up a gluten free recipe for apple crisp just bugged me so much.  Just because I have Celiac Disease doesn't mean that when I make a gluten free recipe I also have to be dairy, soy and egg free. No-I just would like it gluten free please. No I don't want it gluten free. I need it to be gluten free. Big difference. I really WANT a regular piece.  But I don't need it to be a healthier version, or other allergy free versions. I want real butter with real brown sugar etc for my 1 time a year piece of apple crisp.

I must have looked at 15 recipes (at least) and all of them either had some other sort of dairy/diet accommodation or it contained 3-4 ingredients that are expensive and I don't stock (yet) because I don't know how to use them.  Sure, I can spend a few random hours shopping for these ingredients and then making the recipe, but if it doesn't taste good to me, if it doesn't taste like apple crisp, if it's "ok" but NOT apple crisp in my heart, mind, soul-then I don't want to waste those hours. I will just get frustrated.  Those who know me, know I don't have hours to spend just playing around in the kitchen.  I WILL throw it across the room if it doesn't turn out.  (I did control myself when I tried making biscuits -from a mix none the less- and they didn't rise. They were literally cookies/hockey pucks).

I'm a dietitian. yes I like to be healthy. But when I"m going to have my 1 apple crisp for the year-yes I can control myself to 1 occasion-I want it to be good.  I don't want it to be an "ok" version. When I say it's an "ok version" that means it's edible.  It's a different dessert. It's NOT apple crisp. 

So...I need xanthem gum, arrowroot, brown rice flower, almond flour, gluten free oats, or a gluten free cake mix (5$ a box!).

Yes, I can make something like this.  but I know deep down it won't do it justice. Not to me anyways.  I want the REAL thing. 

(I wrote this in such a fury you would have laughed at how many spelling errors there were!)